The Perils of Tebow's Time

The National Football League holds less of my attention every year -- baseball's more my speed nowadays -- but you can't get through the sports lags anymore without running into Tim Tebow. And, with plenty of Facebook friends based in Denver, I've heard plenty about Tebow Time.

There's plenty about the genuflections of Tebowing, as well as the straight-arrow, God-praising personality that's earnest for some and aggravating for others. And, of course, the last-second heroics that create a ratings bonanza for broadcasters and moving the Denver Broncos into a series of national games of the week.

What I'm not seeing is the obvious. In offering loads of praise and whooping it up with every pull-it-out-of-the-hat win, everyone -- from the passionate fan to big-shot sportswriters -- steers clear of the fact that Tim Tebow's a lucky guy. A very lucky guy.

I admit I'm not much of a Broncos fan anymore. I still haven't forgiven Edgar Kaiser for firing Red Miller as head coach 30 years ago (and the team for not elevating Miller or the late broadcaster Bob Martin to the Broncos Ring of Fame). And, for someone whose first memorable season as a fan included the thrills provided by Marlin "The Magician" Briscoe, I've seen better Broncos teams through the years.

What strikes me about this season, however, is the massive amount of happenstance involving the Broncos and Tebow. Even as a garden-variety fan, it's not hard to see that team's benefitted from a Berghof-sized picture window of opportunity that's unlikely to occur again anytime soon.

First, there's the AFC West division: It's lousy. The Kansas City Chiefs, last year's champs (yes, really), flubbed the first half of this season, and both the San Diego Chargers and Oakland Raiders wasted early season momentum. Even Denver's winning streak leaves it only one game above mediocrity (and only two ahead of last-place Kansas City).

Second, Denver's nine wins come courtesy of a lot mediocrity; of 14 games to date, only five involve teams with winning records. Denver's standing against better-than-.500 teams is 2-3, and one of those wins (Cincinnati) is in the credit column of former Broncos quarterback Kyle Orton.

Third, Denver's recent winning streak also included missing quarterbacks, with Kansas City's Matt Cassel disappearing during the first game with the Broncos, and Jay Cutler of the Chicago Bears leaving the team before that matchup. Both were replaced by quarterbacks overwhelmed by any opponent on any given Sunday.

Fourth, the variation of the single-wing-and-a-prayer offense installed for Tebow proved to be a bit much for some NFL defenses, although the main product wasn't points; instead, it ate up the clock and, combined with Denver's sharp (and well-rested) defense, kept games low-scoring and close.

Yes, in the past few weeks, the ball's been more in the air when Denver's on offense, although that's also when facing bad and banged-up secondaries (including New England's). The Patriots also effectively stopped  Tebow's option capabilities with schemes that are probably in heavy video rotation with coaches in Buffalo and Kansas City.

However, both teams have little to play for -- the Bills are already out of the playoff hunt, and the Chiefs will be done if Buffalo loses. The only thing Denver may need to fear is snow; Tebow Time has literally been a fair-weather phenomenon until now.

Not to totally discount a season with an outstanding athletic performance from Tim Tebow and a grinding defense, but the 2011 season for the Denver Broncos also involves a remarkable string of just-enough efforts against dull and uneven competition, along with a heapin' helpin' of, well, luck. At some point, the luck -- and the time -- will run out.

X-press way to Your Garage

Whenever the auto-show season begins, someone invariably comes out with a "best-of" of cars that looked great, turned a lot of heads, and somehow never made it to your driveway -- or any garage in your Zip Code.

And then there's the worst-of tally, usually of cheap cars that appeared en masse in every suburban parking lot for five years, and then disappeared in some kind of Rolling Rapture. Unlike some limited-edition German autobahn cruiser, it was the kind of vehicle owned by someone you knew.

In my case, that person was me. Pick any bad-beater list, and I've owned at least two. A 1972 Ford Pinto. A 1989 Volkswagen Fox. Even one of the all-time schlagers ... a 1978, four-door, automatic Chevrolet Chevette.

There's another perennial entry, though, that gets panned as a major Detroit mistake. With this one I beg to differ, mainly because I alos owned one and found it something more than a bucket of bolts.

Ladies and gentlemen, return with me to the early 1980s, when General Motors offered its view of the future ... with the X car.

Here, with one car, a U.S. manufacturer offered innovations such as front-wheel drive and better gas mileage -- not to mention a snazzy rod-based manual transmission with Teflon-coated parts. People bought 'em up, whether in Buick, Oldsmobile, Pontiac or Chevrolet iterations.

Unfortunately, all those swell new parts came together without a real idea of the sum, which led to several problems with weird steering under acceleration. (GM apparently did a quick fix for the models sent to car magazines, which didn't help the car's later reputation.) Owners of manual-transmission models, meanwhile,found out quickly that Teflon and hot engine fluids didn't play well together.

That, however, wasn't a problem with me. I bought, brand-new, a 1981 Chevy Citation five-door hatchback with a 2.6L V-6 engine and automatic transmission. I think it fell under one recall for a reason I can't remember.

I also can say, without hesitation, that it was one of the best cars I've owned. 


Frankly, there are a number of car writers reporting more on experience than reputation. Tag a car as crap, and it's a self-sustaining identity.

One of the major problems with worst-car lists is that someone writing about a 30-year-car and likely didn't drive one, let alone own it.  These less-than-classic cars aren't found at expo or museums. It's just the reputation that keeps building, especially when automotive writers have a fast one pulled on them by a car company.

My Citation was no wonder car. I can tell you it was the roomier car I ever owned, with incredible cargo space with the back seat flipped down. The V-6 delivered plenty of power without guzzling gas, and the front-wheel drive performed great through a number of Colorado and Montana winters.

I pulled six years of good service out of the car before trading it in for a 4-wheel-drive pickup that gave me nothing but trouble before expiring on the same day I paid off its loan. The Citation the one car I regret selling, and it deserves a few words of praise.

It was also the car I owned when I got married 28 years ago. It's the one that had the soap-written wishes n the huge back window, and the tin cans tied to the rear axle. A few years after I sold it -- and nine years after the wedding -- I thought I spied the old Citation in a Denver parking lot.

I crouched down under the rear bumper and, on the rear axle, were the straggly ends of the string used for the tin cans. The car still looked ready to go whatever distance you cared to try. I hope it kept going for a long, long time.